5-21-2012 Trial and Error

Jerusalem Fowl

"Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?' And then will I declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.'

      Matt 7:21-23

 

Column Capital at Scythopolis  

During our visit to Israel, I discovered yet another paradox in my makeup, Adonai. I need Your help making sense of this one. I became aware of my struggle, as I was trying desperately to download pictures from my cell phone onto a friend’s computer in order to send out one of my blogs direct from The Holy Land. In the effort, I had to try and try again to outsmart the intelligence of the computer, which thought my mobile phone to be a demon of some sort which was trying to attach the computer.

I even tried to make the mobile phone photo files “look” like computer photo files, but the computer wasn’t fooled. As much good as I intended by my attempts, the computer would have nothing to do with my offering.

Muslim Quarter of Jerusalem

I realized two things from this effort. Both relate to how I behave toward You. First, Lord, as much as I want to help, no amount of cleverness on my part is going to convince You that something incompatible to Your plan actually is compatible. Unholy is unholy.

That part of my lesson was pretty easy to pick up, the metaphor stares me in the face every day.  The second challenge however is not so cut and dry.  I have concluded that I seem to learn pretty effectively, using “trial and error” as my technique. As a matter of fact, I have to confess that most of my best learning seems to have come from this approach. The problem is…You do not appear to be a God who designed me to be tolerant of error. Quite the opposite in fact, errors are frowned upon in The Text. I started looking up the scriptural events associated with errors and it’s not a pretty picture. When someone in the Bible is in error, it needs to be corrected.

Interestingly, I had always associated the word “error” with the word “sin” – but researching the translations, apparently I was in error. The most common Hebrew word to define error is…well, Elohim, that’s where this gets tricky…there is no Hebrew word for error that’s used consistently. But most of the words that are used imply a mistake or a blunder.

On the other hand, the two most common words for sin imply an intentional act of disobedience or “missing the target” (either intentionally or through neglect).

Aqueduct at Caesarea Maritima

So I’m a little confused. Are my errors, if presented with the best of intentions, OK? If I keep on erring, but improve over time, coming closer and closer to Your intended design for my life, is that OK? Is that Management by Grace? Or is that the easy way out? Should I be continuously pouring through The Text, seeking ways to premeditatedly avoid errors?

If the latter is Your preference, I’ve got to confess; that’s hard work – especially for someone who, has seemed to prove a successful pattern in the worldly concept of “trial and error”. I’ve been complemented by my peers, over and over again for my tenacity in the face of failure, picking myself up over and over again when I don’t quite” get it right”, learning bit by bit and even giving You the credit along the way for my improvement.

Temple to Pan at Caesarea Pillippi

But the more I investigate, the more evident it appears that my method, however successful by worldly standards, is simply not…Biblical. As a matter of fact, seems to me that Cain was a trial and error kind of guy and I don’t remember it working out too well for him. The successful examples in The Text all suggest that, when faced with challenges, choices and learning opportunities; those who pray and study scripture and focus on Your instruction, get immediate positive results – not a graduated series of near-miss improvements.

This is a difficult lesson, Lord. I like grace. I depend on grace…maybe a little too much. I’m beginning to wonder if I perhaps take a more casual approach to my responsibilities because I know You’ve “got my back”. Does that really get me off the hook? What if I were to approach every action and decision ahead of me as if there was no grace or mercy, but still knowing that You are my judge? Would my behavior be different?

I’ve become too dependent on repentance-after-the-fact. I “get” that errors may not be sins of commission, but they sure do seem to be sins of omission. Whether unknown or presumptuous, I should not take Your immeasurable treasure in kindness toward me, for granted.

Mark at Nativity Gardens

I’ve confessed this to You before and I’ll need You’re continued convicting help, Holy Spirit; to show me the difference between haphazard experimentation and prayerful exploration of Your instruction. Please help me see the errors of my ways before making them. Help me investigate and dig more deeply into Your word, “rehearsing” my decisions and actions rather than living a seat-of-the-pants lifestyle.

Master, I know I’ll still err. But, with Your guidance, I can become better practiced in a new approach (at least for me). I’ll strive to look ahead, study intently beforehand, pray and practice trust in Your instruction. What name would fit such a lifestyle…presumptuous obedience? Possibly. Or maybe another word, overused and poorly understood in today’s world…

…faith.  

I’m Yours to teach.

Mark C.

It took me several try to get this right (Wait…SEE, there I go again!)

5-10-2012 Tourist or Disciple?

Manger stone found at Megiddo

Watch yourselves, so that you may not lose what we have worked for, but may win a full reward.

2John 1:8

 

Tell Megiddo city gate

We were at Megiddo, Lord, as You know; the ancient Tell where countless armies had confronted one another and where, in the future Your final battle will be fought. While walking through the ruins on the surface and then the tunnels below, I was busily snapping pictures, left and right – trying to “capture the moment “– when it dawned on me that I was not “in the moment”. I had walked over broken pieces of history, climbed upon walls of antiquity, explored trenches and hideaways of forgotten cultures, all with stories to share about how we as humans either lay claim or siege to ground that You already have title. And I was so engrossed in being a spectator, that I was not absorbing the powerful lesson being offered to me.

Water tunnel under Megiddo

            This neglected foundation was not just a place of lost civilizations or abandoned strongholds, this was a reminder of how we pursue and commit to our future. I have experienced so many times in my brief history, when a goal or a thing that I want is in my sights. I have charged out to conquer my desires and then, once obtained, have placed them in my trophy cabinet (or in my camera)as mementos, quickly forgotten, referenced only now and again as past victories; tales saved to share with children and grandchildren in hopes of impressing and inspiring.

Jeroboam's grain silo 

            I wonder at the crowds that followed you, Jesus. Thousands that were fed, healed and taught, yet they walked away when you offered them the greatest possession of all – Your Love, in return for their love. All they had to do was to wear their belief, not just claim it and hang it as a banner or decorate some remote corner of their home. Only a precious few…disciples they were called, learned the real lesson, the hard lesson. Only these few took on the task of living out what You taught, giving up everything, even their lives, in total dedication to You.

More tunnels beneath Megiddo

Is my faith like that Adonai? Is my devotion to You nothing more than a tourist’s souvenir closet full of relics dusted with neglect, only opened on occasion as some pleasant memory? Or am I truly Your disciple – passionately walking in Your footsteps, wanting to experience moments, possibly even a lifetime, where people I encounter on the street might actually recognize my actions not as my own, but as Yours?

Hidden exit of Megiddo

Sure, Lord of hosts, I understand that even Your apostles had their moments of human frailty, but tourists they were certainly not! They lived and died by Your example and I pray for the courage and strength to do the same. Please convict me if you see me tempted to only be content with a photo gallery ministry. Give me a “nudge” if I start talking of my relationship with You as a past tense touring event.

            Jesus, I look at all that is around me and pray that I am not a collector of memories but rather, like you, a builder of relationships and hope centered in Your love.

Todah Rabah, Messiah!

Mark C.

                 .

5-1-2012 Short Cuts

And a highway shall be there, and it shall be called the Way of Holiness; the unclean shall not pass over it. It shall belong to those who walk on the way; even if they are fools, they shall not go astray. 

No lion shall be there, nor shall any ravenous beast come up on it; they shall not be found there, but the redeemed shall walk there. 

And the ransomed of the LORD shall return and come to Zion with singing; everlasting joy shall be upon their heads; they shall obtain gladness and joy, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away. 

Isaiah 35:8-10 

I’ve read in scripture that You encourage Your believers speak their hearts for their own awareness of direction so that You might walk with them. So here’s my heart:

         Lord, I believe I’m on the right road You’ve directed me to, but me being…me, I’m really tempted to take the “bypass” to achieve a quicker result. Ever since our journey to Israel, I’ve  wanted to rush the process of connecting with other believers in The Land, anxious to build relationships and to learn how they live. I hunger to revisit Galilee and other ancient places, strengthening relationships with our new found friends and establishing new relationships. I want to be there…now. I’m afraid if I wait too long, I’ll lose my passion and desire, forgetting critical lessons that You revealed while we were there. I fear that the growing strife in the area might soon prohibit another visit.

Yes, confession time – I’m thinking ahead, premeditating rather than preparing for what You’ve obviously already set in motion. It’s that “worrying about tomorrow” thing creeping in again – the enemy is so subtle.

At least I’m in good company. I suspect the Israelites of old had also grumbled, saying, “Why can’t we just go up the Way of the Sea road to the Promised Land?” It was a three week trip at most, even for a group as large as that. “Why Sinai?” “Why the 40 year route?”

Moses must have just shaken his head – he had learned the hard way about short cuts. It took him 80 years to learn, so 40 must have figuratively seemed a drop in the bucket. I look at my own “shaping” time and as much as I know You are directing me wisely, I want my way – the easy way, the fast way. It’s so ironic, that in looking back on my journey to this moment, every time I had come to a similar point and had chosen my path preference over Yours; the road turned out to be more difficult and actually hindered instead of enabled my progress.

All metaphors aside, Adonai, I ask You now to walk with me closely in my struggle. Remind me that everything I am experiencing regarding my personal desire to serve Israel is really about responding to Your love of the people and the land. Thank You for providing me with an opportunity to be patient, so that I can practice patience. 

Willing to obey,

Mark C.